


Forbidden

by sinfuldesire_archivist



Category: Supernatural RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, During Canon, Established Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-01-11
Updated: 2009-01-23
Packaged: 2018-09-03 18:38:47
Rating: Teen & Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 829
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8725867
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sinfuldesire_archivist/pseuds/sinfuldesire_archivist
Summary: Dean failed Sam, Jensen was never meant to be with Jared,I can't live in a world where you don't exist





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Note from the Sinful Desire archivists: this story was originally archived at [Sinful-Desire.org](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Sinful_Desire). To preserve the archive, we began importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in November 2016. We e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact us using the e-mail address on [Sinful Desire collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/sinfuldesire/profile).

“Sammy, come on, calm down, please Sammy do this for me, for mom, dad, huh and Jessica, don’t let it win, Sam please,”

 

“I can’t dean,”

 

“Yes you can Sammy, fight it,”

 

“It’s too strong, urgh god, I’m so sorry Dean, I’m so sorry,”

 

“Sammy you can’t leave me, I…I just got you,”

 

Frantic hands place on either side of Dean’s face,

 

“I love you Dean, I always have, always will, never ever forget that, promise when it gets out, you’ll end it, you have to, you’re the only one who can,”

 

“I love you to my little brother,”

 

“Please promise me,”

 

“I promise Sammy,”

 

Lips crush together messily, a sincere goodbye kiss between two lovers. Arms wrap around the pair, sealing them together, sobs wrack through the room.

 

“I...I...I love you Dean,”

 

With wrecked eyes Dean Stares into the blackening eyes of his brother, a whisper escapes his lips,

 

“I love you, always will, I promise to save you little brother,”

 

One last sob

 

Then silence

 

“Sa…Sammy?”

 

A low growling sounds followed by a laugh, erupting through the room, bouncing of the motel room walls,

 

“Well hello there Dean, your dead lover says hey,”

 

 

A few thousand miles away Jensen Ackles wakes up with a start,

 

“What the…”

 

The last few flicks of the nightmare flashing across his eyes. Reaching out for his boyfriend he finds empty cold sheets,

 

“Jay, Jay?”

 

Who was that guy, Sam, Sammy? He looked just like… no no it wasn’t true.

 

“Hello Jensen,”

 

Eyes flicked up, a gasp escaping,

 

“Jay is that you?”

 

A smirk forms on the strangers face,

 

“No I’m….”


	2. Chapter 1

The room blurred into focus, a throbbing pain erupted through his head as he tried to move. He grunted in pain as he stood up. 

“Sammy...”

Dean’s eyes flicked around the room. The wall furthest from him, where he and Sam had shared their…

“No, no, no not final, Imma get him back,”

He pinched the bridge of his nose with his index finger and thumb, out of the corner of his eye he saw a piece of paper folded on Sam’s side of the bed. Lazily he dragged his sore body across the room, picking the paper up; Dean sighed and started to read,

“Hey Dean,

You’re reading this so it means it finally happened, the change, I’m sorry brother. I’m sitting here writing just inches away from me, the moonlight dancing across your body. Those lips, god how I crave for those, remember our first kiss? I sure as hell do,”

A low chuckle merged from Dean’s throat, did he remember? Of course he remembered, it was one of his most cherished moments, slipping into that memory was darn easy.

***Flashback***

“What the hells wrong with you Dean?”

“What’s wrong with me? It’s you Sammy not me,”

“What did I not do now?”

Bodies moving as though dancing around each other.

“Pffft, she was all over you Sam, practically getting you of in the middle of the god damned bar,”

“Yeah and so?”

Dean’s head angrily snapped up,

“So...so...SO?”

“Whatever Dean I’m out of here,”

With 2 strides he was across the room hand on the door handle. A hand grabbed his wrist spinning him around pressing him into the hard oak door,

“Dean…what are you…”

“Shhh Sammy, I’m giving you what we both want,”

Leaning into his brother’s body, dean curled his free hand around the back of the taller man’s head and pressed their lips together, he gasped as Sam prised his mouth open tangling their tongues together

“Jesus Dean, waited so long… so long,”

A moan escaped Dean’s mouth as the pair pressed into each other, chest to chest, moth to mouth, hip to hip, rotating his hips Sam grunted into Dean’s mouth,

“How long Dean, how long?”

“Years Sammy, years”

Pulling away Sam stared into his brothers emerald eyes,

“I have since I was 15 Dean, when you came home stinking of sex with your lips so big and bruised, I was so disgusted with myself, I wanted you so badly,”

“Your 16th birthday party Sam, when I saw you and that wh… girl eating each others faces, overcome with jealously I was, only I could do that to you Sam, and now only I can,”

Pulling his brother back, kissing with enough force to bruise.

“Forever, Dean, Forever,”

***End Flashback*** 

Dean jerked out of the memory, angrily wiping away a few stray tears, focusing back on the letter,

“And all those stolen memories my love, you gave me the best two months of my life, Please don’t forget me lover, I love you always,

Sammy” 

 

He no longer tried to stop the tears as they ran freely down his face,

“I’ve failed him, I killed him,”

Hanging his head, Dean lay down wrapping himself up with one of Sam’s stray shirts, still smelling of him, sobbing for the entire world to hear.

Dean Winchester was finally broken.


End file.
